Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Angry Butterflies

      

When the darkest of the night begins, it separates me from everything; 
from the ground where I am standing to the ceiling that makes me dazed. 
I absorb as I think clearly.
 Quietly.
 And things become different. 
Then wall speaks. 
Scream in my ear rings like never stopping bells. 
All those lost things come back, flying. 
There I close my eyes to see; the vague image of angry butterflies...
 flapping their broken wings constantly reminds me
 that, everything what I had once was real and I still have that everything if I like to believe. 
But somehow, it feels I don't care to believe cause I feel I am happier this way. 
And these angry butterflies go and vanish into the grayish abyss. 
Never to come back.
 While, here I keep wandering... what it was for? 
Those anger.
When I find myself trying to understand the things, people misunderstands.


Pale and jaundiced. 

Just washed my long hair. This morning is feeling so abstract to me.
The pale sunshine and how it being watched.

The face of a butterfly that went and got lost into the grayish abyss,  looks like this.

Cold feelings being covered up and warmed by long hair.
And this moment is precious. Its like someone holding you as you fall.

"The meeting of crows."
 No body is yet the same. 

Feeling Blue.
Heart is no more a stone again
Don't know why
 feeling like being fallen from high
 only to scatter into pieces
later, stepped in and out
in that crowd
Feeling blue, without you.
Why do we even care how we look when in the end, what we only care is warming heart?
& the eyes of mystery.
This world is covered with snow of lies.
where lily is no more a lily
"Separate the bones from my flesh and then you can leave me."
No idea how many times I experimented that to myself and still couldn't leave you.
And I won't leave you
even if I am to broken into pieces that you can't fix.

Wow the spring of my life ! 
I don't know but there's always somewhere I want to go.